a la proxima...

Last year, this time during the summer I was in a bit of a down mood, as per not being in a work capacity and struggling to conserve any last bit of money I still had. I was spending many evenings awake working on my portfolio and getting no sleep for a few days at a time, only to go to interviews for positions that I never got, even though I seemed to get on famously with the people I interviewed with. Is it me?

I would sit at my desk at home and listen to web casted radio and think, I should do this. But I never bothered. SO instead I spent hours sitting and listening to broadcasts through Radio 365, and getting excited about the set lists....more folks into what I was, and as usual so very far away.

Save for one.

The thing is, I spent everyday watching this video at least three times in my melancholy haze and feeling so in this feeling of, well, this song. The title alone felt like everything that was around me. I was just in a really sad place, with only one single glimmer of optimism and a dangling strand of gold that I was unsure I could reach. I truly felt like I was clutching at fantasies and immersed myself further into music and all of these songs I knew so well, but felt a new rebirth of glum appreciation for them...a new setting to feel sorry about myself and be comforted.

The one thing is that, there is a glimmer of hope within this song, because even though we are not left to be be surprised that crap inevitably will come our way, it still always left me feeling that regardless there was something out there that was a slender chance of hope. AND I HAD CLUNG TO IT!

A year later and so much is resolved and for the better and working towards the best. I'm just waxing poetic....as usual..."you're here to cry, i told you,"...i feel humbled in retrospect.